Great Expectations

I put my brand new Sony RX100 on the kitchen table.  For the price, I was expecting greatness.

"Make me a sandwich." I suggested, gently.
It didn't respond.
"The kitchen sure is a mess" I hinted, trying a different approach.
Nothing.
"I've been working a lot lately and my shoulders are sore.  Could you give my shoulders a rub?" I asked hopefully.
Still no response from the camera.

"Make me a sandwich," I said firmly.
I waited.
"Make me a sandwich," this time a command.

The camera sat there, indolent.

I looked around in exasperation, seeking support from elsewhere in the empty room.

"MAKE ME A FUCKING SANDWICH!!" I screamed, spittle landing on my new camera's Zeiss lens.  It continued its complacent silence.

The photos this thing takes had better be fucking divine.

Obviously disinclined to help with the dishes.